I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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