I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
