I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
should my penis look like a turkey
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
