is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
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