If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize