Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize