smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
