he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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