Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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