hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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