Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
