my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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