i don't like sucking hair
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
