is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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