Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
