I wanna passion pit in your ass
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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