So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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