This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
