Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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