I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
