I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
