So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i just made my gag reflex go away.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
