Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
