You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
