It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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