You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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