Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
