He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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