Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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