Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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