I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
