i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Help me help you realize you are a moron
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
