You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
