Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
