this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
