What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
