rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
