True but thats because hes a fetus.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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