Me too!
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
