I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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