I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
