Pants 0. Shit 1.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
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