youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
