In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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