The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
