I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
