I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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