Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
