They should really pass out barf bags in church
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Randomize
