I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
