youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
It's shark week go big or go home
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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